


Glasses

by Kien Rugastelo (cein)



Category: D.N. Angel
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2016-12-28
Packaged: 2018-09-12 22:01:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9092434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cein/pseuds/Kien%20Rugastelo
Summary: Sometimes the smallest things make the biggest difference, even if they're just a pair of glasses.Originally published on FF.net under old name.





	

It was happening again. Niwa was Dark, and he was defending another painting. They had been battling for fifteen minutes now, Satoshi tapping into magic he knew better than to use, and now was exhausted. This painting was special to him, and he wasn't about to let Dark take it away. He would have killed this one; he could have killed it, no matter what Dark said. He was the last and he wanted to fulfill his duty, but all of that was skewed into tearing the work of art from Dark's hands by any means that would not harm the Niwa inside. And now, the familiar pressure was building and he was in no shape to fight it off.

Dark recognized what was happening and backed off on his attacks as Satoshi crumpled to the floor, clawing at his heart with one hand, and pressing his glasses to his face with the other. Dark never quite understood why Satoshi was so reluctant to remove his glasses, but he had the feeling they were really important when Krad began to magically chip away at the fragile piece of metal and glass. As if ticking away the seconds, the thin metal frame would ping, the glass would crack, or a small screw would be magically flung half way across the room, and all the while, Satoshi continued to struggle to keep the eyewear on his face.

Satoshi contracted a bit of magic, biting down a scream as it tore down his spine, and released it back into what was left of the optically useless glasses. He didn't want help, he didn't need help, and he most certainly didn't want Krad to come out and make an artist of himself with Niwa blood.

The glasses chipped again and Satoshi found he no longer had control of the hand keeping his glasses in place. With a small blast of energy, they were decimated, and Satoshi was shoved back into the bleak darkness of his mind.

* * *

When next he awoke, he was stiff, sore, possibly singed, and at his apartment. Before he even had the chance to sit up, he felt exhaustion sweep over him, and knew he wouldn't be able to move painlessly for a while. All of his muscles screamed for rest, and he would relieve them in just a moment. Grunting, he turned to his side just enough to reach under his bed and drag out a cardboard box. He took a moment to breathe and gather some strength before breaking a hole in the small seal keeping most people out, and keeping Niwa–who he assumed had been the one to take him home–from finding exactly what he had in there. Not that Niwa would have been able to do anything about it if he had, but Dark might have figured it out, and then there would be definite trouble.

 He pried the box open and selected a new pair of glasses, looking disdainfully at the remains of his once vast collection. He'd have to find the time to make more, since he was down to his last three. He had originally made ten, only ten. He'd never thought that he'd need more than that. He figured that he would have been able to finish it by now, but it seemed he had overestimated himself and underestimated how familiar he would get with Niwa.

He replaced the seal and stashed the box just in time, as Niwa came wandering in the moment he was setting to lying down again. Satoshi figured that he had sensed the magic and came in to check on him. At least there was one thing working for him: Niwa seemed just as exhausted as he was, even if he wasn't nearly as injured. "You should rest, Hiwatari-kun. Krad did a number on all of us last night."

Satoshi slumped down against the pillow and pretended not to notice how heavily Niwa leaned against the wall. "The painting?"

Niwa rubbed his arm, not meeting Satoshi's eyes. "Dark took it home last night." Nothing was said, but Niwa seemed to think the conversation couldn't end just yet. "I was worried, so I made him come back to get you, since you didn't wake up."

"Thank you, Niwa." He pushed his glasses further up his face, a safe-guard should Krad awaken, though he doubted he would. Krad would probably be out the rest of the day. "It wasn't just Krad. I used a lot of magic last night, too," Satoshi admitted, though he figured Niwa already knew. "It was stupid of me."

"Why?" The question caught Satoshi off-guard and he didn't know what to answer. Niwa elaborated. "I mean, Dark says–Doesn't it hurt?"

"Sometimes," Satoshi admitted, and Niwa searched his face, trying to understand. "Only if I can't channel Krad."

"Channel?" Niwa looked really confused and Satoshi knew immediately that this was something Niwa's mother did not want the boy to learn about. He'd tell him anyway, because Niwa had the right to know.

"Channeling is when you take something and make it a part of you, usually temporarily. You did it once when Harada-san was kidnapped by Argentine." Niwa looked concerned. Satoshi's voice dropped even lower than it had been before as he looked at his hand. He'd noticed a long time ago that his hands were longer and much more elegant than they should have been and he knew exactly why. "When I do that, it makes it harder for Krad to take over, because part of him is already out and put into use, and I can use it against him." They were Krad's hands, used so often that Satoshi's old hands were no longer of much use to him and would never be seen again until Krad could be sealed away. "What I steal is his magic, and because I try only to use Krad's magic, I only need to use some of my energy, and all the consequences go to Krad." Krad was a part of him; he was a part of Krad.

They would never be able to truly separate unless he learned to use his own hands.

Niwa didn't seem as surprised and desperate for answers as Satoshi thought he would be. Maybe it was because they were both so tired. "Does Krad channel you? Is that why you're always hurt?"

Secretly, Satoshi was proud that Niwa would be so intuitive. It would only help them both in the end. "A little. He uses as much of me as I can give before using himself. It's to keep me from being able to fight back."

"That's really cruel." Niwa seemed to be barely able to stand and looked as though he really wanted to sit but was determined not to. "Both of you using each other like that."

Satoshi hadn't expected that, and it took him a minute to come up with a reasonable response, and even then, he knew Niwa wouldn't like it. "I haven't always done it." It was time Niwa knew exactly what lengths Satoshi was willing to go to keep them both around. "I only started when you were trapped in the _Toki no Byoushin_." Niwa slid down the wall to the floor, a look of surprise etched across his face. Satoshi had the strong urge to paint the expression so he could have it forever. It was another part of Krad that had stuck around and he hated himself for it. "I didn't think Dark would have been able to do it on his own, and it turned out I was right."

"Why?" They were both so tired, and Niwa couldn't bring himself to feel anything about this new information. "Why do you give up so much to help me?" The words seemed so hard for him to say.

"Because," Satoshi searched for the answer, and found one that they both could accept, "Unless we're both alive, I'll never be able to get rid of Krad."

Niwa seemed to accept it and changed the subject. "You had a spare pair of glasses?"

"I have a few," Satoshi consented.

The look on Niwa's face told him that he had figured out something. "Your glasses, they're important, aren't they. Not for seeing, either. Every time Krad comes out, they break, and I never see you without them. You take them off sometimes to look at things, but you never let them go when you do." Satoshi was impressed that Niwa noticed. "They're important for something about Krad." There was no question in his voice, but Satoshi knew he wanted to know.

"You're right, Niwa."

"What do they do?"

Satoshi considered whether he wanted to say or not, how much he wanted to reveal, and most importantly, how much he had to admit before Niwa would be placated. "They help keep Krad in." A new look of surprise covered Niwa's face. "They're a seal. I made them a long time before Krad was able to manifest because I knew I'd need them. In order for Krad to come out, I must not be touching them, or they must be broken. After this, I only have three left."

Niwa seemed to take all of this in. "I guess, you've had Krad long before you were fourteen, huh?" Satoshi nodded. "How long?"

"Always." Niwa frowned, and Satoshi figured this was something the Niwas probably never knew. "It's different for the Hikari than it is for you. Krad is born with his host. He can't transform until after Dark is released, but he is still there, whispering into his host's mind, trying to turn us to him." He knew he was saying much more than he wanted and that Niwa was probably taking it all in, trying desperately hard to understand. "I didn't fall for it, though, like some of my ancestors did. Krad never had a hold on me." Satoshi's fists clenched at the small lie and the memory it brought. There was a point when he had believed the angel, but he was lucky enough that Krad had slipped up. He had given himself over completely to Krad's will, but Krad had taken his influence too far and it was then Satoshi knew him for what he really was.

Niwa looked at him with a look Satoshi didn't understand, and he wasn't sure he wanted to. "It must be pretty hard, huh? Having to deal with Krad all the time."

"I wouldn't know." Niwa perked up again. "I don't have anything to compare it to. Krad has been with me all my life. I don't know any other state of mind." He relaxed his head against the wall, his body starting to beg for more sleep. "I used to think about it a lot, what it would be like not to have Krad in my head. I used to lie awake at night and imagine a life with no one occupying the empty space in my mind, talking to me, trying to control me."

"But not anymore." Satoshi smiled grimly when Niwa picked up on the obvious clue.

"I could never imagine it. I tried and tried, but I couldn't picture it any other way. Every time I thought I was close, Krad would interrupt and make it impossible to think about anymore." Satoshi was glad that he wasn't looking at Niwa. He was saying too much and he knew he'd regret it if he saw his face. "I decided long ago that I would never know until Krad was gone."

"Hiwatari-kun," Niwa's voice told him that he wanted to reach out to him, but just didn't know how. Satoshi glanced over when Niwa didn't continue and they stared at each other for a long time. Niwa was the first to break the silence with a smile. "You should get some more rest."

"I suppose you're right," Satoshi conceded. "You should, too." Niwa looked a little surprised again, and Satoshi wondered why he didn't expect him to notice right away. "You're still exhausted from last night, too, and you didn't get any sleep either." Satoshi settled into the covers, not caring that he was still in his tattered uniform from yesterday or that they were both missing school. "Feel free to use the furniture or kitchen."

At first, Niwa looked confused, and he expected him to be, before a grateful smile spread across his face and he exerted considerable effort to stand. "Thanks, Hiwatari-kun." Niwa left the room before another word was said, and when Satoshi was sure he was gone, he put a hand to his glasses' lens, vaguely aware of the magic uncharacteristically pulsing barely within the confines of the metallic bindings.

"It seems we really are out of time, Niwa-kun."


End file.
